Sustaining Ourselves and Each Other: Practicing Self & Community Care Through the Holidays

The holiday season can bring joy, connection, and rest, but it can also bring about pressure, financial stress, reminders of loss, grief, and unexpected emotional triggers. For many survivors, advocates, and community members, this time of year can feel complicated. 

As we move through the winter months, we invite our community to center self-care and community care, not as buzzwords, but as real practices that help us sustain healing, safety, and connection.

Do You Practice Self-Care That Honors Your Capacity?

Self-care is most effective when it honors what you have to give, not what you think you’re “supposed” to do. It can look like the following actions or behaviors: 

• Setting boundaries around your time, your emotional labor, and your mental energy.
• Resting without apology—whether that’s turning off notifications or taking a quiet moment to breathe.
• Connecting with grounding routines, like journaling, stretching, meditation, or simply stepping outside.
• Giving yourself permission to opt out of events, conversations, or traditions that don’t feel supportive.

Keeping these tools in mind, it is also important to remember that our needs are fluid, meaning that they may change from day to day. This might look like different forms of care or boundary-setting on different days, and that’s totally normal.

Self Care Is Important, and Community Care Strengthens Us All

Community care reminds us that none of us heals in isolation. In fact, more and more evidence asserts the power of relational healing, especially when one considers that harm often occurs relationally as well. Each of us has an individual opportunity to both give and receive care, and when folks with shared values and commitment to healing get together, beautiful things happen. 

What can community care look like? The answer is, so many things! Here are a few to start pondering: 

• Checking in with friends, family, coworkers, or advocates who may be carrying extra weight this season.
• Offering practical support, like sharing a meal, giving someone a ride, or helping with childcare.

• Naming harm when you see it, and creating space for survivors’ feelings without judgment.
• Practicing consent every day, from asking before hugging someone to ensuring shared plans work for everyone involved.
• Uplifting cultural practices of care, mutual aid, and collective rest that remind us care is a shared responsibility. 

Something else to remember, especially since many of us already identify as caregivers and healers, is that acts of care don’t have to be big, they just have to be intentional. 

On That Note…For Advocates and Service Providers

Advocates often hold the stories, emotions, and safety needs of others while navigating their own lives. During the holidays, this load can intensify on top of the pressure to take care of ourselves and be well. We encourage advocates to:

• Build supportive coverage and backup plans with your team.
• Take breaks during long shifts, especially on hotlines or hospital calls.
• Create your own plans, not just for safety, but for joy, rest, celebration, and for being in a community where you feel safe and seen.
• Debrief with supervisors or trusted peers
• Celebrate small wins and moments of connection
• Remember that you are part of the community you serve, and your wellbeing matters.

We understand that sustaining this movement requires sustaining the very people in it.

As We Move Forward Together

Care is practice, and each of us practices care for others and for survivors often. This work does not go unrecognized nor unseen, and your commitment to building communities where survivors are believed, supported, and surrounded by people who show up with tenderness and intention is the very commitment that is shaping a world where sexual violence doesn’t exist. 

We hope this season offers moments of rest, joy, and connection in whatever ways feel right for you. And we remain here, alongside you, working toward a North Carolina, and a world, where all people can live free from violence.